#rereading it rightnow
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I am back on my Green Creek bullshit.
#ravensong#brothersong#green creek series#gordo livingstone#mark bennett#carter bennett#gavin livingstone#art#fanart#erli art#god i love this series#rereading it rightnow#so there might be more#but no promises!!!#i am a fickle god
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erm
#what to do when the only thing i really want to do (read a specific fanfic) is triggering. help.#guy discovers that mental illness does not go away forever =w=b oh no.#erm#surely next week i wont have this issue still right.#surely.#cmoon just let me reread the 300K fic i abandoned halfway 2+ years ago when it was still updating......#sillyposting#what to do what to do what to do.#also got a headache again =w=b props from laying in bed all day whoops.#thanks ig.#im so overstimulated and done with everything..... i cant play my silly rythm games rn....#i want to read so bad but FOR SOME REASON. this writer wants to write an interesting story about mental health :/ okay.#(joking btw im really excited to read it but. can not rightnow. ok.)#help.#if only famed snakeboy from hit yaoigame nucarnival was real. that would save me i think.#i need him.
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i just realized something the last episode of season 1 of hand jumper is called Unmaker i think i just realized why it is because that moment is the first real thing to shatter Sayeons belief's or more poetically the death of Jaeil is the unmaker of Sayeons beliefs
chokes sobs GOOD yeag. i would have to reread for thorough analysis and rightnow i am REELING but i like this read. might also refer to sayeon becoming an unmaker, leaning so heavily on her rewinding, but this is a Good Good Interpretation from what i recall
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i am a little bit manic feeling rightnow thinking about norice dynamic again. sometimes its so good to reread ur own otp writing bc when u find a bit where u did them So Correct its like scream . i have exactly 3 lines in a row going so hard in my brain right now
"(...) I dunno.” Iceland swung his feet a little too. “Is that worth it?" Norway hummed and swirled his glass, watching the clear liquid spiral. "Have you ever had that happen?" Iceland asked, fiddling with his own half-empty glass.
WAUGH. AUGUHHHH. kid is so fucked . he wants big brothers advice and to be treated like a little kid AND he wants to be taken seriously and have sex w him. whatafuck. its hard to put these things into words but it comes out subconsciously good sometimes. thank u to myself for Getting It even when u dont know it. i love you so much icelandhetalia. foaming at the mouth n rattling the bars on my enclosure rn (they keep me in here for ur safety)
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i NEED to reread siken's collections rightnow thissecond🤦♂️ i NEEEEEED to🤦♂️🤦♂️
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im fighting to think of what to read ive already finished like 4 of my older favorites this week. I’m not rereading noragami again i can’t but it’s all i can think about rightnow
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hav u ever read catcher and the rye
im rereading it rightnow holden is very special to me he’s like a little brother or a annoying cousin
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that is very scary XD also looks like fun this show (i did not see it as a kid) i used to always watch it, cause i also had several books and loved to read them and reread them....i think rightnow i have..2 and 2 or 3 compilations of 3 books in 1. I loved the show too. it was sooo cheeesy....nbot really scary. but slappy...he was on another level cause he was an asshole i think you can check some epis online. if you look on youtube for “the night of the living dummy 3″ you can find the epi. it was a double epi. and there were others that were gool to sojust to see how it was.... oh no...now i wanna watch....
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Daily Routine + New Hobbies (:
7:00- my room is in a onsuite next to my grandpas kitchen/living room. I always set my alarm for 7:15 but I some how always wake up to the sound of a boiling water kettle whistling. I put on my moccasin slippers and my big flannel so my boobies don't show, then I go out to the kitchen and make some oatmeal and my grandpa pours us both green tea. Then I help him with the crossword puzzle and the rule is I can't get ready till it's done. I then go to the bathroom, brush my gapped teeth, brush my hair, put my contacts in, then find a nice outfit because you can't dress lazy at my new school or you'll be judged. I'd love to just wear sweatpants and sweatshirt to be warm but nope you can't. ): So I find a decent outfit and make sure I'm presentable 7:00- then I go to austins room and watch sponge bob till he's ready. We then grab our skateboards and attach them to our book bags, we walk Mackenzie to the bus and then we can ride our boards, we go to a gas station next to my school where we hide them in the bushes because we can't have them on school property. Then we wait for our friends to get there and put their boards in the same spot, we then walk to school together and wait in the cafeteria for 1st period to start. They serve milk and cereal cups for the kids who dont get breakfast but there's always extra so I get one sometimes 😏 7:35/1st period- Language arts, my teacher here drags her s's on and talks super quiet and soft and we just read books. It's so boring and hard to stay awake, good thing is there's never any homework or tests just book questions. 2nd Period- Algebra, my teachers super enthusiastic and sometimes makes us homemade bagels. He wakes me up pretty good, he's like in charge of the county fair it's so cool 😂, I'm doing good in his class cause it's so hands on 3rd Period- Chemistry, its super hard and my teacher is weird as fuck. She's like so quiet and always cutting her toe nails or rubbing them under the desk super kinky-like. It's so weird but whatever. She's got so many piercings too, we think she's a secret porn star. She's really good at teaching 1 on 1 though, that's the only way I'm passing. 4th period- business, we just sit in a dark room on computers and make presentations on weird topics such as 'spiral Mac and cheese or original?' then present them and try to convince the class to vote for your opinion. It's weird the teachers sick I think cause she's always absent and her works so easy. 5th Period- lunch!! Here I just eat whatever Tracy packed for food and talk to all my new friends which are kinda lame but I can deal with it. 6th/7th Period- SOCIAL PSYCHOLOGY!! I love this class so much we're learning about the brain rightnow and I've learned so much, I love how weird my teacher is, his rooms got buddhas all over and he plays rock music and shit and then he gets in front of the class and even though he's the goofiest guy he's literally the smartest dude ever and you'll learn so much. We're like best friends he always lets me make tea in his room. Also I love green tea now? Just plain. Isn't that weird?? I love it idk why 8th Period- this is the Period I go to photography. It's sooo fun I get to buy a nice camera soon for the class we go around the school or outside EVERYDAY to take pictures for a portfolio due at the end of the year. My teachers awesome, he eats mustard toast. 9th Period- Government/Economics, in this class we learn so much and I'm always focused. I love learning about the government and world problems rather than things from the past. 10th Period- study hall, I love having study hall at the end of the day and luckily I have no friends in this class which actually makes it good for focusing and studying. 2:35- school is finally over, I go to my locker put on my jacket, yes a jacket! I wear jackets now instead of being a cool no jacket guy!!! (; then I grab my book bag and wait outside for my friends and Austin, we all walk to the gas station and buy a big container of hummus and a huge back or black corn tortilla chips. And ofcourse Arnold Palmer tea, it's only like 2 bucks a day when we split the price. Then we grab our boards and ride to this area under a bridge where no one is and where we eat lots of hummus my new favorite food, and drink tea, and they teach me how to skate, I'm already so good at it. At first I needed a helmet but guess what? NOT ANYMORE!!!!! :-) oh and when it's raining my gym teacher who's my neighbor, gives us a ride to school or home from school. 3:00-3:30- we go home and Tracy makes dinner and we all eat and then I take a nap lasting 1-2 hours then I do homework then I play Xbox with Austin, then I study some more then nap another 2 hours then I wake up arounddddd 9:30- I wake up and draw a little, or I go downstairs and work out most of the time but I draw either before or after. Then I go to my room play music on my record player, turn the lights off except for my salt rock and essential oil diffuser which have lavender so I get sleepy (not really) then I sit in my bean bag chair and read this book I've been trying so hard to finish. Idk if anyone reading this would know the name of it, I think it's called 'Eleanor and Park'? Yes it is. See it's so hard to read to myself cause I read a page then can't even remember what it said so I'm trying to teach myself to read slow and comprehend each word. Sometimes it takes me 10 minutes on a page rereading it till I get it. I've also been thinking, I love the name Eleanor, or even park. I just wouldn't want both my kids to be named after the book, but maybe one. They're growing on me I guess. (: 10:00-10:15- I get into bed and get super comfortable, I listen to soft SoundCloud music that usually puts me to sleep thinking happy thoughts, but when a few songs play that I have so much meaning to me, it will keep me up for a little just to think, not to be sad but just to think. I always put it on shuffle so I don't know if they'll play or not. But when they do it's like I can hear a voice repeating in my head singing me the same lyrics. Slowly getting quieter and quieter and then fading away. I loved when you'd sing to me, and a few times not many but a few you fell so deeply asleep, and your voice just drifted away. It was so relaxing and made my heart do a little dance! 12:00- I'm physically asleep by now, but mentally I'm still thinking. I'm always thinking I swear. All day, I just have random thoughts. I guess I'd say my mind is pretty active, even when my body is at rest. I've been dreaming so much, I wake up shaking or sweating or with my hands on my face, and I think about the dream and then I fall back asleep, and when I wake up I try to remember but guess what? My dream is gone. Maybe one day my dream will return, one day when I wake up with my dream still there.
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